


Cycle of Life

by LunaMemoria



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Author is a slow burn writer in training, Bridgette tries to be a good friend and so does Felix, F/M, Friendship, I spent my whole dang weekend writing this thing, PV Love Square, The author sucks at writing romance so have this awkward... thing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-04 14:51:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20472854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunaMemoria/pseuds/LunaMemoria
Summary: “This is really going to be a thing now, huh,” says Ladybug, grinning ear-to-ear as she lends a hand to Felix and pulls him onto the rooftop.Felix tries for a nonchalant shrug, but his face betrays him and a faint smile appears as his eyes travel to Ladybug’s cheery expression. “It is, only because you keep coming back.”..Four seasons, four sides of the same pair.





	Cycle of Life

**Author's Note:**

> This is a continuation to my previous fic, Summer Lights, so please go check that fic out for a better understanding on this one! This is the longest thing I’ve written yet and I’m pretty proud of it, so I hope you enjoy the read!

..

_ Summer _

“This is really going to be a thing now, huh,” says Ladybug, grinning ear-to-ear as she lends a hand to Felix and pulls him onto the rooftop. 

Felix tries for a nonchalant shrug, but his face betrays him and a faint smile appears as his eyes travel to Ladybug’s cheery expression. “It is, only because you keep coming back.”

“Awww, don’t you like my visits? I’m wounded, Felix, I thought we were friends!” She exclaims, putting a hand on her chest in a dramatic pose. It’s something she only shows to Felix, somehow - the relationship between her and Chat is still tense, despite having lost some of the uncomfortable air and professional feel. Perhaps it’s because to her he’s only a stranger whom she only meets once in awhile. It’s easier, talking to someone when they don’t know who you really are, sometimes. He learned this fact with Bridgette.

“I do,” he replies, feeling lighter on the inside and slightly braver than usual. Ladybug’s looking at him now, eyes widened and expectant. She doesn’t say anything back, but he hears it- sees it in her gaze, her raised eyebrows, the silent voice asking him to go on. It's a chance like no other, this moment, he thinks. A chance to say what he wants to. To show his appreciation.

“I know I’m supposed to joke back or something, but you know me. I’m really bad at this whole- friend thing.”

She frowns. “That’s not-”

“-true?” He shrugs, head tilted and a small, tired smile on his face. “I appreciate you always trying to make me feel better about things like these, but I know myself. I’m not good at being fun and being someone’s friend.”

“That’s not true. You’re wrong.”

“Okay,” he says, sparing a moment of awe and gratefulness for her defensiveness over him. He continues. “Anyway. What I was saying in the first place- I think jokes between friends are important and all, but it’s nice to just say what’s on your mind. Let your friend know that you appreciate them, and that you think they’re amazing. I think- I think that’s really important.”

“Wow,” she exclaims. Her face is still as smiley as it was before but he can tell she’s a little embarrassed, albeit being a little proud as well. Like the kid she’s been explaining a complicated question to has finally grasped the concept. “You know what, I take back what I said. You are awesome at this. So very awesome. Way to make your friend cry, dude.”

He tries not to stumble over his words, equally embarrassed and also trying his best. He’s so new at this. He feels like a child for a moment, like he’s sitting there and using what he was taught for the first time. It takes awhile for his jumbled thoughts to form a string of words in his head, but he manages. He learns. He’s better now. He’s getting there. He’s not stopping anytime soon.

“I’m - I’m just saying what I think.”

She giggles, sticking out her tongue and dragging out her words. It’s childish and incredibly endearing. “Okay.”

“And you can’t take back your words- you’re not the one who said that in the first place. I am-”

“Okay.”

“-the one who said it. What-”

“Okay.”

He narrows his eyes at her, and she gives him a peace sign. He smiles again, wider than before.

“I’d ask you what is up with the repetition tonight, but I think I’ll just leave it for now.”

A cheerful nod. “Sure, buddy.”

“Not okay?”

“Nope. I think you’re good,” she says, winks and bumps his shoulder with her own. He laughs and bumps back for the first time, and it feels good, his insides warm and full.

They’re good. They’re friends.

..

_ Autumn _

“I am starting to think that you have no regard at all about my request for you to keep yourself out of weird situations.”

Bridgette makes a face at him, showing him a row of neat white teeth. She’s moved from her original position on the branch of the tree, now standing and leaning closer to the trunk, hands reaching for support on another higher, sturdy branch. She seems to sense that he’s not planning on moving just yet, and sighs.

“What can I say, these ‘weird situations’ often involve a lot of fun. Also, excuse you, climbing a tree in a park is not weird - people do this.”

Chat whistles, doubtful of her words. “Maybe, but I think most people don’t climb forty feet off the ground.”

He looks to the ground as he says this - it  _ is _ pretty high up. He’s been to high places as both Chat and Felix, but it’s always been places like building rooftops, flat surfaces that he can, at the very least, stand on. Being in a tree is… well. He hopes his bad luck is not running too high today.

“You should know by now that I’m not ‘most people’, then. I’m a weirdo. And I like fun things. And engaging in nature is enjoyable, you can fight me on this.”

“I think I’d rather not,” he says with a shake of his head, pleasantly amused. This girl is always full of surprises. A second later, she digs out something from the pocket of her loose sweatpants. It's a red plastic that seems to be filled with candy.

She nods satisfyingly, pulls out one from the packet. “Nice to see that we’re on the same page. Now then, will you be heading off to continue your rooftop walk or…?”

“I think I’ve got enough of ‘rooftop walks’ for now, so hopefully you don’t mind my presence.”

“Don’t worry, I’d have kicked you off the moment you perched on that branch if I didn’t want you here.” She gives him a huge, toothy grin when he widens his eyes in horror. “Just joking, geez!”

She hands him the packet. “Want some? I have chocolate if you'd prefer that.”

“Do you carry chocolate and candy on you all the time?”

“Yup. Snacks too, sometimes.”

“Okay,” he says, reaching and taking one from her packet. It's salt lemon flavored.

She eyes him again, this time with a considering look on her face. “It's a habit I had for the longest time. Thought it might come in handy if I ever needed to befriend a dragon.”

He laughs. “A  _ dragon? _ ”

“Yeah,” says Bridgette. Her gaze is turned away and directed to the far end of the park now, but it feels incredibly long and far away, like her soul has left to visit an old memory. He thinks it's a fond one - she is smiling, after all. But then, Bridgette smiles most of the time, and he doesn't know her well enough to see which are real ones and which are not. “Except this time it's for a huge cat. It helps break the ice, I swear. Look at us now. It's useful, right?”

“Right,” he says slowly. He wonders if they are friends too, now. It feels weird to know someone as both separate entities of himself. On one hand he feels guilty for lying, but the other part of him enjoys getting to see different sides of the people he interacts with. Which, at the moment, Bridgette and Ladybug are the only ones.

“I'd tell you penny for your thoughts, but I get the feeling you won't be telling me anything.”

“You don't know about that.”

“Is this an invitation for me to ask you something? Because I will take it, if it is.”

He resists the urge to shake his head, instead allowing his grip on his suit to go tighter. “That's… debatable. But I don't mind a couple of basic questions. Nothing like my life story or something.” His hand flies up to his mask almost instinctively at this part. He hopes she doesn't notice, but with the way she shuffles in her seat and tenses up a little, she probably did.

“Or something,” she repeats. She realized.

“Yes.”

“I'm not that much of an ass to ask you about your identity if that's what you're worried about.”

“I know.”

“Maybe I should start running a blog and post interviews there.  _ Paris Superheroes Confirmed To Be Real and Kicking Butt-“ _

He knows she's kidding, but he can't help but snort, “you haven't even met both.”

“You don't know that.”

“Well, I'd be a constant lurker on your blog page if that were true. Gotta… catch those Ladybug interviews, or something.”

“ _ Ladybug interviews?”  _ she exclaims with a small laugh, like she finds this incredibly ridiculous but funny. “Why would you need to watch those? Can't you just ask her anything you want to know?”

"We're not- We're hardly friends at this stage." There is something like hurt on Bridgette's face as he says this. She takes a deep breath, curls her body and wraps her arms around her knees.

“You really think that?” Sadness is dripping off from just that sentence. He feels her soft brown eyes on him, and tries his best not to look back. He wonders how they got here - this conversation was the last thing he expected when he chanced upon her during his late afternoon patrol, yet here they are. Here he is, spilling a little too much to a classmate he can barely call his friend.

_ Well, maybe that's just what you think, _ says Ladybug's voice from inside his head. It's from one of her visits, one they ended up talking about his almost nonexistent social life.  _ You overthink things sometimes. It's not as bad as your head makes it out to be. _

_ Maybe all you need is to put down your guard a little. Maybe then you'll see - you were friends all along. _

_ Yes,  _ is the answer he'd have given months ago. But now he's not that cowardly anymore. He knows what he wants, he knows that he can make it happen. He has the ability to change things with just these two hands of his.

“Now, at least. I am working on being a better friend she can trust. I want to be that for her. She deserves at least that much.”

“I think you are one. A good friend, I mean.”

It's an incredibly Bridgette thing to say, but also something Ladybug would say. Genuine. Comforting. He feels a twist in his stomach.

“I- okay. I think I want more of that candy. It's good.”

She blinks.

“Oh, of course, sure!” She quickly reaches for the bag sitting next to her on the branch and holds it out for him. He takes one. It's a lime flavor this time.

“They're all good,” she assures quickly. "This whole packet is a compilation of my favorite sweets. That one you've got there is from Thailand. My cousin bought it for me when he went there last time."

He nods, ripping open the plastic and popping the candy into his mouth. It is a cool and sour flavor. Just like a normal candy, but a while later he tastes sweetness and when he looks to Bridgette, she smiles and shrugs.

“It has a sweet filling. Not what you expected from a lime flavored sweet, yeah?”

He nods, staring at the Thai characters on the packaging. "It's a pleasant surprise."

"Then you have so much more to see. There's way more impressive stuff out there," says Bridgette, standing back up. "Secure your step, I'm climbing further up."

..

_ Winter  _

“Hi,” says Ladybug.

Chat doesn’t move from where he is, only tilting his head slightly, his eyes briefly meeting hers before immediately darting away, a pained expression on his face. He chews on his lip and doesn’t say anything back, for once.

“Alone in the snow two days before Christmas? As if I’d let that happen to anyone, lest my partner.”

“Am I?” He asks, though it feels more like a statement, a confirmation to himself, rather than a question.  _ Is he?  _ He’s been asking himself the same thing for days - weeks. He’s lost count of how long it’s been since their identities got revealed. Everything is hazy and he’s not sure what’s going on anymore. Maybe all of this isn’t real after all. Maybe it’s all just something he dreamt up in his head, being a superhero, having a partner to watch his back- 

...having a friend. That’s all he wanted from the very beginning, no?

“You are,” she says, firm and determined.

“Are you sure about that?” He asks, voice sharp and shaky and hurt. There is a weak smile tugging at his lips. His eyes and eyebrows are covered by his black mask, but the hurt is evident in his gaze. He seems to realise his mistake and too-loud tone, immediately letting the small flare die down, uncertainty slipping back in. “...Sorry, that was uncalled for. I understand if you’re upset with me and don’t want to see me anymore.”

“Whoa whoa, gimme a second here. Calm down, I’m not doing anything. I literally came up to you and greeted you of my own accord, Chat.”

“I lied to you,” he says simply. They are all it takes to state the situation. The truth is plain and laid out there.

“Yeah, about that… I’m not mad? I might have been, if I found out this spring.”

“Spring,” he echoes blankly. She nods.

“I thought about this for a pretty long time, actually. I thought for a second that maybe- maybe you just talked to me so you can get your kiss and free yourself from your curse. Maybe you were just using me. Maybe you were just lying when you said that we were friends, that you liked me.”

“I’m not- I wasn’t-”

“I know,” she assures, “like I said, I thought about this for a long time. It’s funny and ironic, really, how all this time we’ve got this weird friendship going on in both forms? And I even told you to try and let down your guard and befriend more people. Which. There’s also a small part of my selfishness in that, actually - I wanted to help you, but at the same time I wanted to get closer to you, as Bridgette. Also, I think deep down I knew. Not, like,  _ knew- _ know, if that makes sense.”

She cringes at her choice of words, and shakes her head.

“Nevermind that. Take two. But there's… something, something that links both of your sides together in my head, I guess. Besides, these few months I've learned an awful lot about both Felix and Chat, y'know? Felix is so much more than the mysterious boy from class I wanted to get to know, while Chat - is actually a huge softie despite all his sarcasm and awkwardness. And I’m glad that I got to know both of them. I really am.”

“You-”

“What? Was I wrong?”

“...I don't know,” he admits, soft and defeated. “I still owe you an apology, though.”

“Thank you,” she tells him, placing her hand on his shoulder. Only with the warmth of her hand that he realises he’s freezing. He raises his own hand to place it on hers, but it pauses in the air for a moment before dropping back down to his side. She doesn’t say anything about this. “I appreciate it, even if I’ve got over most of that.”

He's frozen. Everything is still a blur, but he knows now, what's the most important thing. He's not losing sight of it again.

“We’re… good, right?”

“Yes," she says, choking back a sob. "Yes we are. We’re okay.”

“I don’t want to be strangers again,” he murmurs. Her mouth drops open slightly, then she reaches her hands to his and pulls him close into a tight embrace.

“We won’t be. I promise,” she says, voice shaking and low and filled with fierce determination. "I won't allow it."

He believes her, and they both silently sob on each other's shoulders.

..

_ Spring _

It's a couple weeks after the defeat of Papillon, and the duo has been spending their time catching back on life - missed schoolwork here and there, scholarship essays and art portfolios and preparation for university, and most importantly of all, restoring the city to its original state. Paris has been left in a horrible mess after the Final Battle - Bridgette's power only managed to salvage so much, especially with her injuries post-battle, but Felix's now the sole successor to the huge Agreste empire and is able to offer plenty of help to rebuild the city. Things are not good, not yet, but they're looking better than before, and Felix is grateful for that.

“I wish it ended better, though,” says Bridgette to him one fine Sunday morning when they're both lying on a grassy plain and staring up at the clear blue sky. It's one of the first days they've got to themselves this spring.

He nods in agreement. His estranged father is now missing and presumed to be dead by some, leaving him with huge businesses and riches and all the things he never wanted in his life at the age of barely eighteen. It's hard, picking up the broken pieces left behind, but he's come to terms with most of it by now.

Recounting his life is... an experience, to say the least.

He had been three, when he lost his mother. Twelve, when he started attending company meetings as per his father's wishes. Fourteen when he started in public school.

Two years of lycée as a superhero. Two years of sneaking around in his empty mansion's storeroom for medical supplies to tend to wounds no one must see. Two years of second-guessing his choices and morals and everything he thought was important to him. Two years of his brain raging a war against the beating of his heart, the twist in his stomach whenever he thinks of his partner whom he lied to since the beginning, his partner that ended up being the most important person to him. Two years of silently wiped away tears and hardships and sorrow and happiness and friendship and love.

Years that lead him up to now, to the current time. He squeezes Bridgette's hand, a proof that she's there, that she exists, that his life up until then is not an illusion or a lie he made up in his head.

For once, he's going to be a normal person. Be eighteen and worry about university and how to spend his weekend. He's going to look forward instead of backward.

“This is so peaceful. I wish we had more time to do this,” sighs Bridgette, moving her free hand to rest on the back of her head. There's a surprising lack of other people around, considering the fact that it's a fine weekend. He doesn't find it in himself to complain, smiling faintly and allowing himself to relax against the soft fabric of the picnic blanket they've laid out.

“Summer break is coming,” he points out. “We're graduating soon. That's exciting.”

“Yeah, and I really do look forward to attending art school, but it's hard to resist the urge to just escape into the forest and live there forever without academics to bother me.”

“Your mom will miss you if you do that," he says, grinning. "So will the Quantics and I.”

“Well, I never said I would go alone! Any family and friends of mine are invited if they're interested.”

“Sure.”

“Hey, you know…”

“Yeah?”

“I can't believe we got here. After all that- all that  _ crap _ the world threw at us. And we survived it all. We can take on the world with these hands!”

“I know.”

“And I'm so, so, so happy, y'know? Like, I never expected this of life, but it manages to surprise me. There has been so much hard stuff and sometimes I feel like I might be drowning to my death, but now we're okay and here and happy. This is so- strange,” she says, a dorky smile on her face, raising her hand up towards the sky, her recently painted fingernails sparkling in the sun.

“I know,” he says again, because he does relate, and it is the truth. “It's- surreal. Sometimes it feels fake to be at peace. Sometimes it feels like I'm just gonna wake up and it turns out that I was just trapped in a happy dream.”

“But it's not. We're here. This is real.”

“Yeah.”

“I wonder what Allegra and the others are up to.”

“She FaceTimed me a while ago. She's planning on writing her own music for her new channel. Allan is helping her with some of them.”

“Her fans are gonna be so excited. She's so great.”

“I still can't believe she's doing her own thing now. Her parents must be so pissed,” says Felix fondly, recalling Allegra telling him about her plans so excitedly her hands were shaking, and even though it was not visible on the screen he could tell she was bouncing her leg under the table, a habit she’s had since young. It makes him so happy, seeing his first and closest friend pursuing her passion when he knew her for most of his life and for all that time she’s been The Music Prodigy who plays as the concertmaster in her family’s orchestra for every big event, filled with empty smiles and quiet obedience. That girl is no more, and now in her place is an aspiring singer-songwriter who has taken on the world with her friends, now working towards her goal with her own effort.

“Well,  _ I’m  _ proud of her for doing her thing at last,” says Bridgette. “Same for everyone. You said something about publishing your own stories before, didn’t you?”

“I don’t know about  _ publishing  _ just yet. But seeing all of you made me think about what I want to do. And what I want to do is write. For anyone who can relate to my experiences. I want to let them know that they, too, have a place.”

“You’ll get there,” she says. He believes her wholeheartedly, because he sees it at last, for himself, the future he wants, laid right before him. He’ll get there eventually.

“Both of us will,” he says. “I’m sure of it.”

_ They’ll be okay. _

..

  
  



End file.
